I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
