google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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