I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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