oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize