Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
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