I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
