She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
