So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
