it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Randomize
