I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Ambien. No doubt about it.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize