If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
