sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize