Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Randomize
