11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
