Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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