Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He did a backflip because drugs
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