I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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