You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize