I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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