i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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