we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize