She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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