So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
