Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
