with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
