I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
