i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
