i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize