Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
