By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I'm having to shit out rocks
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize