tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
