A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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