Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
It's just like the Real World with babies
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
