I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
COCAINE IS GR8
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
