I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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