No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
