Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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