Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
