dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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