He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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