woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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