Nicole vs. Life
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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