Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
