If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
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