at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
