when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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