We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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