so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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