after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
