It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
