The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Randomize
